Entertaining With Kids

The most consistent thought that I’ve had since I became a mother is what did I do with my time before? In hindsight, when there were no kids and just my husband and I, I should have been banned from saying I am too busy. These days, whether I admit it or not, and no matter how long the to-do list stays, I definitely fit way more things in my 24-hour day than before.It is only natural to edit our lives once kids enter the scene. After all, in the game of Kids vs. Sanity, as parents we have to find a way to come out on top. Some of us do this by hiring a grocery delivery service, others by hiring a maid or Girl Friday, and still others by limiting our social activity.Despite my messy home, lively children, busy schedule, the breast pump on the counter, and my empty refrigerator (aside from chicken nuggets, applesauce, and baby food), I want to have a party. A real party. A party where my guests come over and settle in for a few hours of catching up and eating great food. My husband and I have vowed to never run from this urge. To go with the flow and send out that invitation. Quickly. Before we reconsider entirely. Before sanity takes over.In all honesty, our friends deserve more credit than we give them because we never feel judged for not cleaning the smudges of tiny hand prints from our glass doors, or having stickers on all surfaces, or the occasional Lego piece hiding in the shaggy rug (OUCH).Despite their generous and forgiving spirits, here are a few things we do when entertaining in our home:

• Easy Food: We love to cook, so 9 out of 10 times we pick recipes that can be made ahead of time, or can be finished while the company is here (grilling for example). Tacos are our big go-to in the summer since nothing requires cooking beside the protein. In colder months, we hail to the all mighty casserole which can bake while we hang out. The other 1 time, when we absolutely have no time, we order some pizza or felafels. We try to remember that friends are coming over for our company and not just to eat. A fancy meal which leaves us stuck in the kitchen is not the goal.
• Contain the clutter: This applies to both the adult and the kid clutter. If my [unscientific] survey is correct, I know from observing in my own home or in the homes of my friends, that our living spaces suffer from accumulation of things rather than dirt. Small things that don’t necessarily get put away in their proper places and end up looking like a big mess in just a few days. When entertaining, our secret is to stash it away temporarily in a space that the guests won’t see. In our home it is the third bedroom which ends up holding the high chair, the toys, the piles of mail which will be sorted later, even appliances like toasters and coffee maker to clear the kitchen counter space. Seeing less clutter automatically makes the room feel big and clean (even if the dust bunnies are hiding under the table).
• Clean the bathroom: “I don’t mind an unclean bathroom”, said no human. ever. There is no way around this one folks. I always wipe the mirror and floor, change the towel, refill the toilet paper roll, clean the toilet bowl, and either light a candle or spray a room freshener; all in all about 15 minutes of clean up time. All the baby accessories like bath tub, toilet training equipment, bath toys, either get put behind the shower curtain or in the spare room I mentioned before.
• Empty the dishwasher: We all have that one friend who always sticks around to help with the clean-up (bless their hearts!). I’ve noticed that having an empty dishwasher makes it easy for someone to help clean out the sink, if they wish. Likewise, it also makes it easy for me or my husband to load it up while chatting with company.
• Light a candle and turn on the music: A no brainer and a must do even before the guests arrive! A home that smells good will instantly make your guests feel welcomed. But more importantly having these two going while I am cleaning and setting things up makes me feel less stressed and puts me in a good mood.
• Get the kids excited: Making sure that kids don’t associate parents’ parties as a time when they can’t be themselves is very important to us. With two kids under the age of three, I know that logic and reason don’t always win. Trying to tell them to stop sticking Playdoh on the just cleaned hardwood floor or to stop taking out every single toy they own right before company is due, doesn’t always work. Instead of getting angry at them and insisting that they behave a certain way, we think of a distraction to take their mind off the current mess that’s about to be made. Usually changing the music to what they like helps, or making up a task that “I just can’t do without your help” helps, even telling them about who is visiting and why it will be fun to see them will possibly keep them from messing up your hard work. In the end, just remember that it will be easier to deal with a little bit of mess instead of an unhappy child. Choose wisely, friends.
• Move the party outdoors: If you have a yard, don’t even think of hosting a party inside during the warm months. Have the guests meet you in the back (or front) yard directly and by pass the whole house.
• Get a nanny or babysitter: Perhaps I should put this one on the top of the list. If you have the resources, and if you have friends who are also bringing their kids, it might not be a bad idea to have a professional take care of the littles while the adults enjoy some peaceful entertaining like in the old days! This is also more likely to get your friends out who have kids who otherwise might find the party a hassle.

Teaching our children to slow down, tidy up, cook a good meal, and celebrate with friends is a very important life lesson. Showing them how to comfortably entertain, laugh despite the messes, calmly solve problems, and cherish people and moments instead of perfection is a precious gift to them. So, slow down, put the wine on ice, and relax. Life will go back to normal after the party, so savor the precious moments in between.by: Chika Patel, Blogger and Social Media Manager, My Girl Friday